That Vibe

Ok, I don't know what's going on with me. Then again, I think I do. It's not an ongoing thing - it just happens everytime he calls.

I use to really be into him and I thought we was vibing me too. There seemed to be every indication that we could ....now I can't even say it. Then, we had the 'talk'. You know the one where they list all your good qualities as if it were going to really soften the blow of the inevitable let down. The 'I don't see us together' is a killer.

Now he's seeing someone and he's really happy. Deep down somewhere I'm happy for him too. I don't dwell on what happened - we remained friends after that little chat. I don't spend my days thinking of him, matter-of-fact I'm seeing someone myself. So tell me, why do I feel like such crap after I receive a text or a phone call from him? It's not just a phone call; I can handle talking to him. It's when he talks about how right she is for him that it stings. Now given all that has transpired I gather to say that he was right, we weren't suited for one another - not in that way. But still I have the ache and I wonder if it's not jealousy. Over the fact that I listened on late night phone calls to his whining and dramas'; that he was never this outgoing with me. You can put so much time into a man that you began to feel like you own them - you created that. And then all your hard work goes to some other woman.

Perhaps it’s just jealousy over the fact that I couldn’t be that special to someone who I thought was special - he is, in fact. Letting go is harder than I thought, something always lingers there. Who knows why we crave things that we know we don't really want.... I just want to be done with it already.

Yeah, I Said It

Bitch is a term for the female of a canine species in general. It is also frequently used as an offensive term for a woman, taken to mean that she is malicious, spiteful, domineering, intrusive, or unpleasant. This second meaning has been in use since around 1400.

I really felt the need to define this word before I go off on my tangent today. I don't want anyone acting like I'm just misusing it or trying to deliberately be offensive. You get so used to guys screwing things up that you forget that women can be just as petty and catty. Why do certain women/girls have to go there? Why do they have to mess up good men before a good woman can get to them?

This only pertains to the women who make this word come to the edge of your mouth. I just figured they must have forgotten the definition of this word, since they insist on acting like one. Have some respect.

I have one final definition to leave you with...
A relationship breakup refers to the ending of a relationship, typically a romantic one. A breakup can vary between emotionally traumatic to consensual for those involved, especially if romantic love is involved.

Breakups can occur for numerous reasons such as conflicts in personality, lifestyle changes, or attraction to a different partner. Breaking up with someone is also commonly referred to as "dumping" (Though dumping is commonly used in situations where one person has feelings for one that are quite strong, but the other dosen't generally feel the same way, as in "Borice was dumped". However, due to the negative connotations of 'dumping', many who have consensually ended a relationship choose not to describe it thus. Furthermore relationships that are ended through "dumping" usually also end the friendship, however relationships ended mutually more often become friendships. –Thank you Wikipedia

Ok, so I want to be fair about emotions, ‘Emotionally Traumatic’, it said. What realm that extends into for you, I don’t know. I agree, when someone dumps you, the need to be chummy is gone. But why think that making their life miserable is going to change anything? Why waste any moment of your life on them? Everything is hard to hear when it envolves someone saying, no matter how nice, that they don’t want you. Yet I can’t help but wonder why one couldn’t be civil about it. The games won't help you move on.

Delta of Venus

I'm feeling quite creatively woman today and that can only mean one thing...it's time to re read some Nin. If you're not familiar with Anais, here's an excerpt of her famous journal writings

"The kiss in the taxi is the kiss which remains in the memory as perpetually unfinished and to be sought out again, for as the taxi moves it gives to the moment that physical proof of insecurity and ephemeralness of adventure, over swift, arousing resonances which cease at the first stop, the taste upon one's lips is a quick, deep lacination arrested by the sudden stop of the machine. The interference of the traffic is the recall to reality. Eyes out of the crowd rummage into the taxi to catch that flash of vertigo, that open mouth, the drunken look in the eyes. The street lights are the searchlights, opening crude ways into the smokey clouds of cigarette smoke, breath and perfume. And now the taxi is rolling again, the kiss is broken by fear of its termination. When the taxi stops, the adventure is broken. One steps on the pavement with a sound of a body falling from heaven."

And now I'm obsessed with this website - not that you haven't heard it mentioned before I'm sure, but have you visited this 'sin'fully wonderful bit of spice. Once you read Anais you really need the clothing the match the mood.
http://www.agentprovocateur.com/

Gin &Tonic

It's so embarrassing, but for the past week and a half I have gone to bed with at least one drink; Gin & Tonic or Rum & Coke.

Being an adult is difficult to say the least and responsibility has just about worn me out. It's one thing after another - looking after your credit, paying the bills, making the money, planning future enhancements, finding love, maintaining relationships, etc...

Right now I'm doing all those while trying to finish the book I've spent more than two years writing and not writing. Yet at night I can't help but wish all this were mapped out already and the task of completing it all had been taken care of. That drink instead of being taken to bed with just me, might just be taken to a bed filled with the relaxing contentment of achievement (and a man).

Enough angst and boo-hooing. How are you?

How Instant Messaging can screw you...

My conversation on Yahoo Messanger with the guy I'm kinda seeing:

JD: what are you doing tonight?
Gin: my friend, that doctor I was telling you about wants to have drinks tonight
JD: what doctor?
Gin: the girl doctor
JD: do you two have drinks often?
Gin: no
JD: that must be weird, sitting there, talking with him over a beer, knowing he's seen your ..
Gin: what? what are you talking about? I've never slept with the doctor
JD: I didn't say that
Gin: I'm talking about the girl that cute doctor I told you about
Gin: I'm quoting you: JD: that must be weird, sitting there, talking with him over a beer, knowing he's seen your
Gin: what's that then. lol
JD: but doesn't the girl doctor examine you below the waist?
JD: oh (insert blushing emoticon here) lol
Gin: lol
JD: I thought you meant girl doctor as in the doctor who checks out your lady parts
Gin: lol
Gin: There's no way in Hell I'd have drinks with my GYN
Gin: lol awww..."your lady parts". how adorable
JD: lol. that's why I was so confused!
JD: lol I'm glad you think I'm adorable
Gin: and then you thought it was a guy doctor too. awwww
JD: yeah, I thought he was hitting on you since you're so damn cute and sexy

In A Fog

I am literally 'zombie' like today. Thanks to my own drug choices of Allegra and Benadryl - a not so smart combination to cure my sinus problems. In my defense the Allegra was not drying up that nasty post nasal drip - yeah, yeah, I know its a yucky think to speak of- the benadryl took care of it in a matter of hours and finally sweet sleep started washing over me, only to wake up this morning feeling like I was an extra in Night of the Living Dead.

This past weekend, I took my niece to Sesame Place. Yup, kids galore, running around on sugar highs, crying jags, and temper tantrums. Any motherly instinct I might have had was frozen in fear on Monday. Oh don't get me wrong, kids can be amusing and down right cute - lets not forget about the unconditional love they tend to dole out. But didn't I want to reach out and grab the kids who ran over my feet, shoved past me in line, and those two little girls with the grabable hair that knocked over our Big Bird lunch pails - those meals cost $8 bucks a pop. So for the day
I was a rock star as far as my niece was concerned, I'm the cool aunt... but I could have easily been thrown out for busting up a couple of kids- and that's just a little scary. Not exactly a motherly thought is it?

I was redeemed however when the mother in the bathroom stall next to me called out to her run away son (he'd slipped under the door and was running around the bathroom) three times and had her request for him to come back ignored each time finally murmured under her breath "you little shit". If that's acceptable I may not be so bad after all.

HoneyMag.com

Well folks, seems everybody wants a piece of me. Naw, just kidding but I'll tell what isn't a joke, HoneyMag.com! Where all the fly urbanista's hang out. Starting last monday I packed up some of TPOL started blogging there.

What your going to see is an extended version of the Video Clips I post here. Each week I'll pick one topic and stop people on the street to discuss it on camera. So I hope you'll join me there as well, here's the link: www.honeymag.com/modules/politicsoflove

So what's been going on with you guys lately? These past few weeks I've been trying to get out more and take in some stuff. I miss the days where I could stay up 2am then get up at 6am - I might just be getting older. ugh. Went to see the Yeah Yeah Yeahs last week, it let out at about 12:30am, the bags under my eyes didn't let out till two days later. But Karen O rocked the @%*( out of the Electric Factory - haven't felt that alive in a long time. So I posted a CD giveaway on the Playlist page to celebrate the emotion of music and to say thanks to all you babes that show up here every week to read my ranting.

BTW, am I the last to find out that Tootsie Pops come in Tropical Flavors!

Weird Thought of the Day

I've done my fair share of traveling, I've always traveled with friends and family but never with someone I was seeing romantically. Now I find myself wondering how that experience might be.
For the first time in my life I'm wondering about how sharing this bigger part of my life will effect me. In the past it seemed a distraction to take a boyfriend traveling; I already had travel partners, we had similiar likes & tastes. Better yet we had goals, I'd grown up with these people dreaming about what sights we'd see and journeys we'd master before settling down.

I'm a bit scared that we won't mesh, that the close proximity that goes hand-in-hand with most journeying might bring to light all the unpleasant qualities we're bound to have. Sharing similiar interest with your travel partners can make for an enjoyable trip, whereas long spans of travel with partners with opposite interest can really have a lasting effect on any relationships for better or worse.

I'm worried that I find out that too much about them doesn't mesh with my personality and that that will be the beginning of the end. Therefore, I'm hesitant to go anywhere for longer than a weekend jaunt.

French Milk

Oh so wonderful...the weekend is here!

So here's the plan - I'm gonna film an intro for the website. Oh that reminds me, Check Out my new opening page - I'm a sucker for Alice in Wonderland. So much wordplay, hidden sexuality and of course drug use (lol). With that in mind let me tell you about the new book I've been reading, French Milk. It's a new comic journal about Lucy Knisley, who spent a month in a apartment in Paris with her mother; enter more sexuality, new adult awakenings and really accurate descriptions of Paris living. You should definitely go to the bookstore and find it.

Funny...just got a text 'Hello' from my A&F guy, who apparently thought it would be cute to text me from 'Hooters'. Ah...wings, beer and breasts. It does actually sound heavenly so I'm not gonna judge.

Ok babies, I'm multi-tasking - shopping Ebay - finally gonna purchase that Adult Alice in Wonderland outfit ;)

What Turns You On?

OK, so perhaps you've noticed I've been away for awhile. Other than being wrapped up in the last Harry Potter book, work has been a crazed. Therefore I'm not getting to film in Philly till this Friday, the 3rd. Sorry babies, I know I said today, but I haven't even composed the article for this week yet!

If I haven't expressed it before, let me say it again, I love doing the Video Clips - meeting all you fantasically open people. So this week I'm going to pry and find out what fetishes people are holding onto to. What turns you on? Feet, smells, lingerie...?

Personally, I'm turned on my words - no, I'm not ashamed of such a nerdy turn-on - not if you're wooing me with similes and metaphors, not if you're talking about words encompassing more than four syllables; I go weak at the knees. I don't care! One of the sexiest words in the dictionary? Concupiscence... Mmmmmm. I can just see the clothes peeling off...

Who Doesn't Love A Good Mix Tape?

There's nothing better than the Summer Time, except maybe a great mixtape for a weekend car ride. But for all of us stuck at a desk during beautiful weather that can be a bit difficult.

So this week I've started a Politics Mix Tape Section...Yeah, that means I'm laying down the music I wanna hear! Seriously though, if you've got a good compliation, send me the list and I'll try and feature it. Don't forget to Theme it people!

That brings me to another great project, the InternationalMixTapeProject. People from 'all around the world' (duh) participate by sending a personal mix tape to their monthly assigned buddy, and in return someone out there in the cosmos gets you as their assignment and BAM! you've got new music at your doorstep each month. You just never know what you're going to get - that's the best part, it's a musical journey without a known destination. This fly guy named Ryan runs it - Check it out at http://www.internationalmixtapeproject.com/

Bye Babies!

So Fresh and So NEW NEW

Well, Well, My Babies... I've updated the Archives section so that it's a little easier to navigate now.

And I promised an update on the blind date second date didn't I? Can I just be honest and say that I'm still in a bit of shock...he's nice; average and nice. Now, I'm not using average in a bad sense - its just I always imagined myself with someone artistic and uniquely different in some spectacular way. So if I allow myself to get involved with someone who I perceive doesn't fit that bill is that settling or just being realistic and open to a different point-of-view? Don't lie and tell me that you don't often feel the same way. Nevertheless, I agreed to a third date. I agreed to another meeting - that amazes me to no end. But he's sent me daily texts to say hello, sweet emails during the week - and honestly, I can't come up with a good enough excuse on why this guy shouldn't have a fair shot. It's not a crime to shop at Ambercrombie & Fitch or to (ugh) wear man sandals...

Enough picking at him - back to business. I'm loving the emails being sent to me from the 'Leave Some of You' section of the site!! You guys are voicing what you think the next article should be about and leaving pretty intriguing relationship questions in my inbox and I've been responding to everyone. Keep em' coming!

I think we'll be filming in Philly this weekend - Look out here I come!

Oh Boy!

Goodness, the numbers for the site have been fantastic over the past few weekends! You know what that means? Somewhere out there are people logging into my site on Sat & Sun before or after those drinks, dates and states of vegetation in front of the tv. GOOD LORD, the Politics is getting popular. LOL

It's ten mins to quitting time here at the ol' nine-to-five. Am I the only one waiting for their 'real' career to pay off so you'll never have to return to a desk again?

Tell you about my second date with A&F guy tomorrow, gotta run!

Men on the Brain

When I was younger my dream men used to be Jon Cryer, a.k.a, Duckie from Pretty in Pink, Elvis Costello, Jeff Goldblum, Jon Cusack and David Bowie. If you were a misfit, misunderstood, or slightly odd, and nerdy yet prolific then I wanted to smear my tinker bell lip gloss all over you.

Now don’t get me wrong, I watched Charles in Charge because of Scott Baio and I definitely saw every movie the Corey’s were in – but they just didn’t do it for me.
I still have the hots for Goldblum and Bowie. Cusack could give me a call any day. What I realize is that along the way to adulthood I lost sight of reasons why they were so attractive to me.

Instead of searching for the unique I started drooling over the obviously cute and let’s face it the obvious is never really the most interesting. They lack the sort of personality that maintains appeal. You grow older and you begin to realize that in the grand scheme of things ‘looks’ isn’t everything. I realize now that I was on to something in my young age.

Blind Date

I'm so excited - it's Friday and you get to see the new video clips! And I also get to tell you about my blind date yesterday...if you can call it that. Is it fair to say that if you've known of the person for awhile but never actually met them face-to-face?

So I was a little stunned-he was your typical 'guy at Dave Matthew's Concert' only thing missing was the plasic red cup of beer. I could tell from the look on his face that I wasn't what he'd pictured either. Was that a bad thing? not necessarily, we're going out for drinks tonight. But he is my anti-guy - you know the one personality you never really imagined yourself giving a chance. But at this juncture in life I'm realizing that the guys you think you have figured out are never what they appear to be. And if I'm using that in a negative way, doesn't it sound like it could be construed as a positive thing as well? Maybe he'll surprise me.

Iced Coffee & Queens!

MMWAH! That's to all the sweeties who stopped and talked with us on Saturday in NY!

Kay and I trekked from the Seaport to Times Square looking for those unfraid to spill their secrets in front of my tiny little video cam...some just couldn't hack it and others just went for it. I can't wait to post the footage on friday.

Just when we thought we were done and on our way to see 'Phantom' - yes that's right, I like theater, I went to see Phantom (ps. wasn't that great, but its one of the biggies that you just can't ignore-shame on any broadway babies not checking out the classics.) Oops, I digress...ANYWAY, just when we thought we were done stopping people I SPOTTED THEM, three glorious queens! Yes that's right boys, I'm talking about you! They were freaking funny and down to earth, so make sure you come back friday to see them dish on one another.

Unfortunately you won't see the Starbucks cutie I spied over my iced coffee-to shy to film-hopefully not to shy to email and give us a Hall Of Shame interview.

Oh, I almost forgot about my first guy, the first one to agree to be filmed, a Friends with Benefits wet dream cause he's caught in the game. How many guys do you see falling for the FB? I know, I know...hardly any. If you wanna hear his story you'll have to wait till friday. Until then!

Wait! Stop ignoring the Mailing List! Tell us who you are! No more vague emails people! I wanna hear your dirt!

On The Town

The Politics is leaving for New York today - I'll be tramping along my favorite parts of the Big Apple. Somehow, I will manage to put the Gray's Papaya Hot Dog down long enough to grab victims off the street for the Video Clips/Hall of Shame sections of the site.

What The Heck! Next Week I'll just theme the whole site in honor of the city that never sleeps...ugh that's so cliche.

Yet, it is my home away from home and I hope you'll come back next week to check out my adventures. I promise juicier secrets, dirty questions and let's pray for spicer answers...

The Politics is out to make you blush - stay tuned.

In the Land of Texting, he said..."

I'm so pumped on myself right now. Forgive me my human weakness...

It's not right to be non-humble about oneself. But I just got a text from the guy who says "I need space." "Right now I just can't give of myself." And from that text sprung the instant gratification of knowing that you arent as forgettable as you may have previously thought. Without shame, I admit that I'm going to enjoy having the upper hand in this situation.

It's been two weeks since his moody departure...yet somehow he expects that with one text, that with one single "HI" all the time in between should somehow melt away and I should suddenly become available again.

Nice try. Had this been his first 'space needing adventure' then maybe. But after a handfull of 'tomorrow's' this girl is determined not to be the fool again.
So tell me, how would you handle this situation?

Sick of Cock Shots

Personally I am sick of guys sending cock shots to my email when they ask me out. They never want to just chat and familiarize themselves with you - its always "let's meet up!" Now how would I identify you should I want to meet up if your cock's not hanging out?

Why are men always trying to fly higher when you haven't even given them clearance to leave the ground yet? Must be an Icharus complex.

For the future guys... how about a picture of your face - let me see if I can stand that before you try woo'ing me with your meat.

WANTED: DATING DISASTER STORIES!

The Politics is looking for the worst dating disaster stories you've got for the new section of our website called: GOOD RIDDANCE

If you've got a good story on the worst date ever; a reason why you'll never hook up with that person again, then we'd like to HEAR IT! and since we try to help those less fortunate, lets try and end the story with a moral. LOL

This way the rest of us can steer clear of the losers too.email us at:ginger@thepoliticsoflove.net

Brand New S@$!

The vacation is well over and the new site content is flourishing...

Once again THANK YOU to everyone who emails and encourages me to keep chugging along with this zany idea!

Make sure you check out the video clips we filmed on location in Paris & Dublin-we pried into everyone's business getting them to spill the goods on everything from breakups to guys with big wallets.

Remember that you don't have to wait for me to find you - if you have video of you and your friends waxing poetic, send it me at ginger@thepoliticsoflove.net and I'll share it with EVERYONE!

It's Always Over Before You Know It

Well darlings, this is the last day of my European Vacation and the interviews for the video clips section will be posted by Friday. I had so much fun finding out the dynamics of relationships and viewpoints of the people I encountered on my trip - I'll try to include some of my thoughts and observations along the way. Until then...

Restless

I'm feeling down today - be it the weather or the fact that I've been sitting at my desk for too long. I hope the weekend gets better, but lets face it sometimes you just have to ride the blues out. The best way I know how to handle it is to immerse myself in music.

So if you're feeling what I'm feeling then I hope you like the selection I've left you for below. I discovered this singer (Jay-Jay Johanson) flipping through the channels on t.v. on a rainy day in a Paris hotel room. His voice just lulls and lifts - never has misery sounded so sweet.

Jay-Jay Johanson - She Doesn't Live Here Anymore

One Week Down Already!

Well, my Politics of Love website has been up for a week now. Thanks to everyone who has dropped by and checked it out! Tomorrow a new article goes up along with my hope that everyone will continue to share this journey with me.
Ginger
www.thepoliticsoflove.net